[Archived] Effective Parenting

[Flopsy]

Good luck with coming up with names, we had a new cadet turn up last night called....

River Brown.

I deserve a medal for not laughing out loud and keeping a straight face

[lockers]

When mine were on the neo natal unit the baby next to them was called bonny blue! And her big sister's middle name was red, and had a brother called Emanuelle! Quality names

[Cocker]

I liked the fact that the driver really didnt understand what he had done wrong - click

[Billy Castell]

Me the missus just had our first in March, we had identical twin girls....double trouble!!!

Same as my parents.

As for names, Montage or Bonjella for a girl, or Tarquin or Xerxes for a boy.

[Ozz]

20 week scan done yesterday-good news for Rovers-it's a boy. And he is all OK.

[yoda]

I liked the fact that the driver really didnt understand what he had done wrong - click

At least he did not over do it with the sherry!

[Ozz]

Week 32 and according to the measurements at the doctors today, he currently weighs around 4 pound 12 ounces, and is likely to be around 9 and a half when he squeezes out in November. Wonder where he gets his size from...

He has been kicking lumps out of mums bladder and lungs too of late, which is amusing. Getting a bit nervous now.

[Flopsy]

mate, you wait untill she's been in labour for 60 hours and you havent slept or eaten anything useful for 30 hours

[colin]

and is likely to be around 9 and a half when he squeezes out in November.

Oh my gowd,

The better half will be struggling with that one.

You are going to to get some serious abuse in the delivery room. Take earplugs & ask the midwife for a few whiffs of the "gas & air" mixture.

It's quite nice and r*e*l*a*x*i*n*g. for the father-to-be

But probably does sod-all if you're the mother giving birth to a 9.5 lb baby.

As usual, happy to help, and spread some sunshine around.

[American]

That's small for my family.

Which explains why Mrs. American hasn't been quick to want kids.

[Flopsy]

and she's been investigating getting an epidural from 4 months in and having an elective C-Section.

Ozz, remind your good lady, it's never to early for an epidural.

Are you doing the NCT classes? they were most useful

Oh, not wishing to give you worry, but, if for anyreason they come to after the birth and say they think Ozz jnr has some problems - say Downs, heart issues etc what ever you do, dont let them go away until you've asked what the (Please don't use that word again) that means and what issues that raises, such as short term medical problems and longer term, and if they dont know, get them to get some one who does. Don't take no for an answer, or you'll regret it later.

Also, don't be bullied by the nurses midwives in the hospital, keep asking why are you doing that? and dont be fobbed off. They should not give your child anything unless you agree with it. So if they say they need to give him some formula (that is if you're missus is going to breast feed), demand to know why they need to. Its probably a good reason, but you have the right to know why they're doing it, and a lot of the time they dont know why they're doing it, its just in your notes to do.

[roversmum]

A big problem of pain in labour and childbirth is fear. If your lady knows exactly what is happening and why it helps a lot.

I used a sort of relaxation technique for two of my babies and had very little pain. They were born 20 years apart but I could still do it after all that time! Long time ago but it goes something like this (she needs to practice every day):

Lie down somewhere comfortable preferably with no cushions or pillows under your head. Relax for a moment or two, then work through your body from the feet, flexing the part of the body you are working on and then relaxing it. Work unpwards, then just completely empty your mind of thoughts, imagine being on a lovely warm beach somewhere and let the sun soak through you. Stay in that mode for a little while. After a couple of weeks you will be able to sink automatically into this relaxation mode. When your labour starts just go into this mode and your body will automatically relax, allowing the necessary parts to do their work unhindered. Don't take any medication unless it is absolutely necessary, it will take away your control - they will try and press it on you but you will know if you need it. I had none and both babies were born wide awake aware. The nurses are unused to seeing alert new babies - they are usually drugged up with all the stuff the mother is given.

Make sure that the midwives are aware that this baby may be large, they will keep an eye out for problems.

A close friend of mine had two babies, one eleven pounder and her second was 12lbs 14 oz - they didn't have scales big enough to weigh her! Both were born very quickly with no problems; and my friend is very small herself - think Kylie Minogue size without the bust! So don't panic!

Best of luck and keep us posted!

[gumboots]

Just had our eldest over from germany to have our first grandson christened. The two younger kids were at home as well. Stood in church and said to my husband, "Aren't our kids great?" Eldest son had gone back to Korea but managed to join the party afterwards on the webcam and Skype. They are blooming hard work and cost a fortune (don't know about rovers but we could do with a billionaire take over) but they are worth every last penny and every last bit of effort we've put into them. My advice as a mum of 4 is "Give them all the time you can. Don't worry about what you can't afford because the best thing our kids remember is the good times we've had as a family. Only fight the battles you need to win with them. Make it clear from the start that yes means yes and no means no and neither of those is negotiable. I'll think about it means just that and no amount of pestering will make me decide sooner, in fact it's likely to make me say no rather than yes. And LAUGH A LOT. Kids are fun. Enjoy them." Our kids still choose to visit us as often as they can, come on holiday with us even if we're not paying, invite us to go to the cinema with them (and pay for us sometimes) We encouraged them to do things which means that they keep disappearing to foreign shores but they keep coming back through choice not through obligation.

[thenodrog]

Just had our eldest over from germany to have our first grandson christened. The two younger kids were at home as well. Stood in church and said to my husband, "Aren't our kids great?" Eldest son had gone back to Korea but managed to join the party afterwards on the webcam and Skype. They are blooming hard work and cost a fortune (don't know about rovers but we could do with a billionaire take over) but they are worth every last penny and every last bit of effort we've put into them. My advice as a mum of 4 is "Give them all the time you can. Don't worry about what you can't afford because the best thing our kids remember is the good times we've had as a family. Only fight the battles you need to win with them. Make it clear from the start that yes means yes and no means no and neither of those is negotiable. I'll think about it means just that and no amount of pestering will make me decide sooner, in fact it's likely to make me say no rather than yes. And LAUGH A LOT. Kids are fun. Enjoy them." Our kids still choose to visit us as often as they can, come on holiday with us even if we're not paying, invite us to go to the cinema with them (and pay for us sometimes) We encouraged them to do things which means that they keep disappearing to foreign shores but they keep coming back through choice not through obligation.

Dunno why I had this impression gumboots but you must be older than I thought you'd be.

[colin]

And LAUGH A LOT. Kids are fun. Enjoy them."

That's it. You've hit the nail on the head there for me.

[jim mk2]

And LAUGH A LOT. Kids are fun. Enjoy them."

Kids are great until they become T-E-E-N-A-G-E-R-S, and then they become about as much fun as the prospect of another Tory government.

[gumboots]

Dunno why I had this impression gumboots but you must be older than I thought you'd be.

54 and jim since I work every day with teenagers, coping with my own was bliss most of the time compared to some of the kids I teach.

[rosie]

Just had our eldest over from germany to have our first grandson christened. The two younger kids were at home as well. Stood in church and said to my husband, "Aren't our kids great?" Eldest son had gone back to Korea but managed to join the party afterwards on the webcam and Skype. They are blooming hard work and cost a fortune (don't know about rovers but we could do with a billionaire take over) but they are worth every last penny and every last bit of effort we've put into them. My advice as a mum of 4 is "Give them all the time you can. Don't worry about what you can't afford because the best thing our kids remember is the good times we've had as a family. Only fight the battles you need to win with them. Make it clear from the start that yes means yes and no means no and neither of those is negotiable. I'll think about it means just that and no amount of pestering will make me decide sooner, in fact it's likely to make me say no rather than yes. And LAUGH A LOT. Kids are fun. Enjoy them." Our kids still choose to visit us as often as they can, come on holiday with us even if we're not paying, invite us to go to the cinema with them (and pay for us sometimes) We encouraged them to do things which means that they keep disappearing to foreign shores but they keep coming back through choice not through obligation.

I love your post and couldn't agree more, being one of six and a mum of four. Even though my life is mental at the moment, I think they're all brilliant.

Re: the childbirth thing - if she can do without the epidural and painkillers, push hard for that,and definitely avoid a caesar at all costs unless it's absolutely necessary - recovery time following a natural birth is "usually" (I have to qualify this because it may not be in every case) way quicker. Gas and air is the best (and if all's going smoothly, a good midwife will give you guys some space alone so you can havea go too) but if she can have the birthing pool as well, that is the icing on the cake. I absolutely recommend that. My final bit of advice is to ask her beforehand to try not to pull your hair out! :-) Good luck!

[Majiball]

and definitely avoid a caesar at all costs unless it's absolutely necessary

Why would she want a Salad?

[Flopsy]

get her fing nails cut chort and filed smooth. If she does go for the epidural and C-section free birth, you'll thank me

[Ozz]

11.31 am today, Lee-Ann gave birth to my first child-In the blue corner weighing in at 8 pounds and four and a half ounces, I give you ........................George Matthew Jones!

So happy, wish I'd done this sooner...

[colin]

Ozzie,

I'm so pleased for you. I know what you're feeiling. It's immense isn't it?

Your son is beautiful.

Colin

[Flopsy]

you've got to hope he takes after his mum though

Congrats sir

[AussieinUk]

Congratulations Oj! Very envious of you sir.

[roversmum]

Oh, well done, Ozzie and partner. What a little cracker, young George. Is that his daddy's nose he has? Trust you are taking good care of him and his mum. Congratulations and best wishes xx.