Gary Speed

[Roaming Rover]

So sad, agree that it shows what football is really about. Just a shame it takes something likes this to cut through the money and selfishness which football is now viewed. Hope whatever demons gary had, he is now free from....as for depression, quite often it's when your on your own you get dragged down, when people are around the depression is pushed to one side to a point. I guess that could explain him on football focus. But whatever pushed him to it is not my business, I'll just remember the great footballer, manager and nice bloke in football....

[modes98]

On another note, Why is it people only care about soldiers when a famous person dies? the amount of ignorance i've seen comparing the deaths of service men and Gary Speed is just beyond believe.

Mm that annoyed me too. Although the guy who posted it is a boxer and a military trainer so I decided against arguing.

It's not like soldiers know the risks when they sign up to the job or anything!

Still brings a tear to the eye thinking about Speed. Can't quite take it in.

[RibbleValleyRover]

Alan Shearer still numb and in shock over Gary Speed's death

[roverandout]

i suffer from depression from time time, sometimes i even think about the S word but i would never do it as i know of the heartache and distress it would cause my family if i did, i also have thoughts that maybe there a happier times around the corner so that keeps me going, i either have real highs or real lows, just something that you cant help, i think boredome plays a big part too.

[Grez]

i suffer from depression from time time, sometimes i even think about the S word but i would never do it as i know of the heartache and distress it would cause my family if i did, i also have thoughts that maybe there a happier times around the corner so that keeps me going, i either have real highs or real lows, just something that you cant help, i think boredome plays a big part too.

Sorry to hear that. Make sure you keep talking and don't bottle it up. The wider public need to realise that depression is nothing to be ashamed of and is not something that you can pick and choose. Stay positive, keep taking deep breaths and remember that you are a good person!

[roverandout]

thanks grez, that means alot.

i sometimes suffer from panic attacks too brought on by my mood swings which doesnt help my health, i just take deep breaths and listen to music when it happens.

[T4E]

i suffer from depression from time time, sometimes i even think about the S word but i would never do it as i know of the heartache and distress it would cause my family if i did, i also have thoughts that maybe there a happier times around the corner so that keeps me going, i either have real highs or real lows, just something that you cant help, i think boredome plays a big part too.

Have you been to see your doctor? If not please do. They can help, I promise. There's so many things you can try, even if it doesnt feel like they work straight away over time they can, until one day you get through a whole day without thinking about it. Those days become weeks, which in turn become months, and, touchwood, years.

There are things you can do, don't be afraid to ask. Good luck friend.

[roverandout]

thanks t4e, i dont think its gotten to the stage where im always feeling down, there are just times when i feel kind of sad, i dont want to be a victim because i have some good times as well, i feel stressed when i feel that way which brings on my anxiety attacks, when i see other people laughing and joking i find it hard to join in because i am trying to think of something positive, i dont think its got to the medical stage yet where i need to see a doctor for advice or medication, hopefully i will put it behind me and move on.

[T4E]

It's not a weakness, it's a strength to do something about it. I know that sounds like crap but it's the case - its way harder to tell someone about it than it is to sit on it.

You don't have to take medication, you'd be amazed how much just talking to an adequately qualified and experienced person can help. There's many options, have a look in to it and see if any of them can help you.

Sorry to lecture you. Please don't suffer in silence.

[roverandout]

no, your not lecturing me, im glad of the advice, thanks for your help, i will have a look into it online, i hope it will pass.

[Aberdeen Blue]

no, your not lecturing me, im glad of the advice, thanks for your help, i will have a look into it online, i hope it will pass.

Plus you can always "talk" to someone via this forum; we all disagree at time but we all share one love, Rovers. ###### happens and our online family is at each others throats right now because of the pillock of a "manager" and the bloody chicken barons but at the end of the day it's football; Shankly was wrong, life is more important and so are you loved ones.

PM's always welcome.

[Kamy100]

i suffer from depression from time time, sometimes i even think about the S word but i would never do it as i know of the heartache and distress it would cause my family if i did, i also have thoughts that maybe there a happier times around the corner so that keeps me going, i either have real highs or real lows, just something that you cant help, i think boredome plays a big part too.

Really sorry to hear this.

We are all here for you. There is always someone on here who you can talk to. Don't ever feel that you are alone.

[BigUts]

Plus you can always "talk" to someone via this forum; we all disagree at time but we all share one love, Rovers. ###### happens and our online family is at each others throats right now because of the pillock of a "manager" and the bloody chicken barons but at the end of the day it's football; Shankly was wrong, life is more important and so are you loved ones.

PM's always welcome.

Superb post. Never have I read a better one on here.

Edited November 28, 2011 by BigUts

[Kelbo]

i suffer from depression from time time, sometimes i even think about the S word but i would never do it as i know of the heartache and distress it would cause my family if i did, i also have thoughts that maybe there a happier times around the corner so that keeps me going, i either have real highs or real lows, just something that you cant help, i think boredome plays a big part too.

Rover, and on here I dont mind sharing, many years ago, my marriage broke down and I was divorced, whatever the reason, you feel a failure and become depressed, your sense of humour is not how it was, everyone seems to be looking at you, talking about you and you are really down.

I went into Town one day to take a package from work, I passed a young girl, 20 tops, in a wheelchair, no legs, laughing and joking with friends, she looked vibrant, happy and enjoying her day, that changed my mindset completely, there are always people worse off than yourself, happier times are round the corner, they were for me and will be for you, if you ever need to talk mate, PM me, it will go no further and I am, as are many on this messageboard, here for you should you need me.

[Tom]

Superb post. Never have I read a better one on here.

Seconded, Glenn and Ste (and those who went before them) should be credited with building a good community here and I know Glenn is keen to build that in the real world.

[BuckyRover]

I agree wholeheartedly. It's a nice place to be a member of.

[Paul Mellelieu]

Roverandout,

I've suffered from depression for over a decade and it's something you need to treat seriously. Happy to be PMed, but do please see you GP soon.

[roverandout]

thanks kamy and everyone, its good to know people care about others who suffer from this 'disease' makes me feel a whole lot better

[Audax]

thanks kamy and everyone, its good to know people care about others who suffer from this 'disease' makes me feel a whole lot better

This is not the place and time to speak too much on this but just growing up is hard enough, someone back in school did away with himself over a girl, those kinds of stories aren't even totally rare. I think a lot of people have had problems. Now, that I'm an old boy, it's all downhill!! But truly, I do believe I suffered more in my 20s.

[Tyrone Shoelaces]

I've suffered from it for about 15 years ever since a really messy divorce. I'm good at the moment but who knows what's around the corner. Getting it out in the open is a start,

[BuckyRover]

This thread shows how it affects so many people. There is a history of it in my family and it certainly does concern me.

[Torgeir]

Most people don't commit suicide when they hit rock bottom. Usually it's when they're starting to feel better and on the up, as that's when they feel they have enough energy and 'confidence' to go through with it.

I don't want to speculate on what happened in this instance, but I think the players union need to look at setting up an educational facility of some sort to help ex footballers. Being out of the limelight is a tough nut to crack for many former stars. They have been pampered for most of their adult life, and before that, by their mothers. So something to help them get settled into real life and how to manage the daily grind. I am by no means saying this is the case with Gary Speed, but his tragic death brought this issue to the front of my mind.

My thoughts are with Gary Speed's family and close friends.

[Taggart]

Roverand Out - well done buddy, that must take some courage to write that; many people are very embarrassed about talking about depression and the illness and affects that it has. I have not sufferred from it, but I do have experience of friends who are now classed as bi polar I believe; lots of ups and then downs and no real medium ground. For some this is a way of life and you manage it as such, others will speak to the GP to see if they can find a way of maintaining the middle ground, through medication, or exercise or finding somethign to relieve the boredom that will help manifest happiness and wellbeing etc.

I think you are really brave and courageous for what you have posted and I, like the others on here are more than happy to have a PM, email, conversation thread on here, or whatever mechanism you want, if you feel the need for it buddy

[thenodrog]

Rover, and on here I dont mind sharing, many years ago, my marriage broke down and I was divorced, whatever the reason, you feel a failure and become depressed, your sense of humour is not how it was, everyone seems to be looking at you, talking about you and you are really down.

I went into Town one day to take a package from work, I passed a young girl, 20 tops, in a wheelchair, no legs, laughing and joking with friends, she looked vibrant, happy and enjoying her day, that changed my mindset completely, there are always people worse off than yourself, happier times are round the corner, they were for me and will be for you, if you ever need to talk mate, PM me, it will go no further and I am, as are many on this messageboard, here for you should you need me.

Indeed. One only has to pick up a newspaper to see people with much bigger problems than one's own. A sense of perspective must be a key factor.

Edited November 29, 2011 by thenodrog

[broadsword]

the scary thought that occurred to me was that if it can happen to Gary Speed then it can happen to anyone.