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Blue n White Rover Posted February 7, 2011 Posted February 7, 2011 Jamie Carragher has been arrested at Stamford Bridge. He didn't realise he had £50million in his back pocket....
Grabbi Graeme Posted February 14, 2011 Posted February 14, 2011 If you see an Arsenal fan out walking their dog, ask them to ring 0800 4-0 4-1 4-2 4-3 4-4, for advice on hanging on to a lead.
Grabbi Graeme Posted March 7, 2011 Posted March 7, 2011 In light of the recent gun incident involving Ashley Cole, Roman Abramovich has put his own brand of gun onto the market, it's called a Cole Ashley Kov Apparently Gaddafi has made a £40 million bid for Ashley Cole as he has heard how good he is at shooting students.
Presty On Tour Posted March 8, 2011 Posted March 8, 2011 I wonder if Buzz and Woody off "Toy Story" ever met any of Andy's mom's toys.... Especially since they probably have the same names!
cn174 Posted March 20, 2011 Posted March 20, 2011 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aPb7Ctgs-Ws made me giggle
Sandiway Blue Posted March 20, 2011 Posted March 20, 2011 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aPb7Ctgs-Ws made me giggle only one word for that.....Karma!
Grabbi Graeme Posted March 23, 2011 Posted March 23, 2011 My mates asked me if I wanted to rob a bank in a French Town, but I said no, there's too much Toulouse. When I was at school I belonged to a gang called The Secret Seven and we were sworn to secrecy. We were so good that I never found out who the other six were.
philipl Posted March 30, 2011 Posted March 30, 2011 An Englishman, a Frenchman, a Spaniard and a German are all standing watching a street performer do some excellent juggling. The juggler notices that the four gentlemen have a very poor view, so he stands up on a large wooden box and calls out, "Can you all see me now?" "Yes." "Oui." "Sí." "Ja."
Guest linganzi Posted March 30, 2011 Posted March 30, 2011 Why did the French chef kill himself ? He lost the huille d'olive
Grabbi Graeme Posted April 4, 2011 Posted April 4, 2011 For anyone who has never seen this, it's childrens show Rainbow going carry on, although this episode was never broadcast it was filmed to show to behind the scenes staff at christmas.
rebelmswar Posted April 4, 2011 Posted April 4, 2011 ... and gone viral! Boiled rabbit in Ryans future.
philipl Posted April 4, 2011 Posted April 4, 2011 A chicken crossed the road and met James Bond, 'What's your name?' asked the chicken, 'Bond, James Bond. Whats yours?', 'Ken, Chick Ken.'
philipl Posted April 6, 2011 Posted April 6, 2011 YOU KNOW YOUR LIVING IN 2011 WHEN........... 1. Your evening activity is sitting at the computer 2. You learn about your redundancy on the news 3. You'd rather search all around the house for the remote instead of pushing the button on the t.v 4. You cant go anywhere without your mobile, leaving it behind causes you to panic 6. You get up in the morning and go online before breakfast 7. Every t.v advert has a website 8. You read this agree and smile 9. You didnt notice there was no number 5 10.You actually looked up to check if there was a number 5 11.Now your laughing at your stupidity MEN'S ENGLISH 1. I am hungry = I am hungry 2. I am sleepy = I am sleepy 3. I am tired = I am tired 4. Nice dress = Nice cleavage! 5. I love you = let's have sex now 6. I am bored = Do you want to have sex? 7. May I have this dance? = I'd like to have sex with you 8. Can I call you sometime? = I'd like to have sex with you 9. Do you want to go to a movie? = I'd like to have sex with you 10. Can I take you out to dinner? = I'd like to have sex with you 11. Those shoes don't go with that outfit = I'm gay
Grabbi Graeme Posted April 6, 2011 Posted April 6, 2011 Why are Fulham fans complaining about their statue, it was way cheaper than the £50m Chelsea paid for theirs...
bazza Posted April 7, 2011 Posted April 7, 2011 Man sitting at home on the verandah with his wife and he says, "I love you." She asks, "Is that you or the beer talking?" He replies, "It's me.............talking to the beer."
Billy Castell Posted April 7, 2011 Posted April 7, 2011 There is an English man, a Scotsman and a Polish man sitting on a train in some remote part of the world. The Polish man searches in his bag, pulls out a sausage, takes one bite and throws the rest out the window. The English man asks "why did you do that?", to which the Polish man replies "I'm from Poland, and we have loads of sausages so we can afford to waste them." Next, the Scotsman takes out a bottle of whiskey, takes a sip, then throws the bottle out the window. The other two give him a curious look and the Scotsman responds by saying "Well we have so many distilleries producing so much whiskey that we don't know what to do with them, we have too much whiskey" A short time later, the English man suddenlly grabs the Polish man and throws him out the window. The Scotsman shouts "Why the hell did you do that??!!!" The Englishman replies, "I'm from England and there are so many of those we don't know what to do with them." --------------------------------------------------- . He even quotes Stan Ternant around 6 min 20 secs.
rebelmswar Posted April 7, 2011 Posted April 7, 2011 There is an English man, a Scotsman and a Polish man sitting on a train in some remote part of the world. The Polish man searches in his bag, pulls out a sausage, takes one bite and throws the rest out the window. The English man asks "why did you do that?", to which the Polish man replies "I'm from Poland, and we have loads of sausages so we can afford to waste them." Next, the Scotsman takes out a bottle of whiskey, takes a sip, then throws the bottle out the window. The other two give him a curious look and the Scotsman responds by saying "Well we have so many distilleries producing so much whiskey that we don't know what to do with them, we have too much whiskey" A short time later, the English man suddenlly grabs the Polish man and throws him out the window. The Scotsman shouts "Why the hell did you do that??!!!" The Englishman replies, "I'm from England and there are so many of those we don't know what to do with them." --------------------------------------------------- . He even quotes Stan Ternant around 6 min 20 secs. Yetidog is going to be on you like a dog on its nuts. Maybe.....
Billy Castell Posted April 7, 2011 Posted April 7, 2011 Why is that? It was actually my Polish friend at work who told me that joke.
rebelmswar Posted April 7, 2011 Posted April 7, 2011 Why is that? It was actually my Polish friend at work who told me that joke. He has this weeks political officer badge.
colin Posted April 14, 2011 Posted April 14, 2011 At Turf Moor last week a Burnley fan was spotted climbing over the wall at half time. The stewards grabbed him, dragged him back inside and made him watch the second half. I thank you ladeezngennlemen
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