Things that drive you nuts about the beautiful game.

[Miller11]

My latest one is a player lying on the floor behind a wall. My instruction would be to chip the ball and hang it over the wall and the big lads to trample all over the pillock.

[bigbrandjohn]

  On 06/01/2023 at 15:29, Dreams of 1995 said:

This in any walk of life these days

You go to a concert, public procession, fireworks show, whatever - you name it and there will be people watching through their phone screen

I don't get it...be in the moment!

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That’s my resolution for 2023. At least my wife’s resolution for me. Gotta lose the FOMO thang.

Mind you I missed the best moment when Jamie Rednapp scored against us in 1995.

I stonked out of the room and hid myself in the garden. My wife called out “you are missing the celebrations.  Man Utd drew with West Ham.”😳

[bluebruce]

In no particular order...

The ludicrous wages and ludicrous ticket & shirt prices.

Agents.

Terrible referees.

Diving and other cheating.

Venkys ruining my beloved club.

The obsession with 'bigger' clubs, especially since it's primarily predicated on what attendance figures happen to be, which there is also a sad obsession over.

Glory hunting fans.

Awarding of handballs for people smashing the ball at someone's hand from 5 ft away.

The pandemic of Dutch Disease.

Slightly tangential, but any time somebody calls Alex Ferguson 'Sir'. His prefix should be 'That Cunt'.

Edited January 6, 2023 by bluebruce

[Mike E]

  On 06/01/2023 at 15:29, Dreams of 1995 said:

This in any walk of life these days

You go to a concert, public procession, fireworks show, whatever - you name it and there will be people watching through their phone screen

I don't get it...be in the moment!

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My mum missed my graduation because she was trying to film it. Lesson learned.

[simongarnerisgod]

football "fans" who think the game was invented in 1992

sky sports

the continuing,dwindling standard of officiating

uefa and their champions league ****,it should be a straight two legged knock out from round one

managers who insist on passing out from the back despite their players not be able enough to do it properly

the good old sliding tackle,it leads to a booking these days,even if you get the ball

[bigbrandjohn]

My wife has lobbed one into the hopper. 
 

Players who stop, start and jink about as they take penalties.  She loves it when they miss. 

[Norbert Rassragr]

What is Dutch Disease? It sounds like something you might catch off a prostitute.

[Ianrally]

  On 07/01/2023 at 10:55, Norbert Rassragr said:

What is Dutch Disease? It sounds like something you might catch off a prostitute.

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You get it from tree hugging

[Ianrally]

  On 06/01/2023 at 15:09, bigbrandjohn said:

Oh another couple.  
 

The routine shirt pulling and arms around each other at corners. A few bookings and penalties would sort that out.

My favourite is arguing with the ref. “I would l luv it” if some one introduced a law that pushed the play up ten yards every time it happened  as in Rugby. That would shut a few gobs up. 

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The line of defenders at a corner, non of which are looking toward the ball, only intent on blocking opposition players as though we are playing American Gridiron. 
What happened to the obstruction law?

And what happened to the foul throw law? I must have seen at least ten foul throws in the WC. 

[roverandout]

The trouble with female commentators is their commentary is too forced.  With the men, it's just natural.  

[toogs]

  On 07/01/2023 at 11:20, roverandout said:

The trouble with female commentators is their commentary is too forced.  With the men, it's just natural.  

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You are probably safeish saying that on here. I wouldn’t say it on FB or twitter though, you’ll get torn a new one 😂

[Oldgregg86]

  On 06/01/2023 at 11:46, Sparks Rover said:

NEPOTISM and CRONYISM 

 

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What’s your opinion of a 20 year old Romeo beckham signing for Brentford 😂

Edited January 7, 2023 by Oldgregg86

[simongarnerisgod]

  On 07/01/2023 at 12:27, Oldgregg86 said:

What’s your opinion of a 20 year old Romeo beckham signing off Brentford 😂

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when they find out he has`nt yet learned to pass the ball using  the side of his foot,he`ll be released pretty quickly😆

[bluebruce]

  On 07/01/2023 at 10:55, Norbert Rassragr said:

What is Dutch Disease? It sounds like something you might catch off a prostitute.

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It's probably that too, but it's all the senseless inane passing around at the back.

[bluebruce]

  On 07/01/2023 at 11:20, roverandout said:

The trouble with female commentators is their commentary is too forced.  With the men, it's just natural.  

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I disagree, but if it were true, I would wonder how much of that would be them feeling pressure from loads of judgemental men listening. Kind of like how I'd feel if I were asked to talk about sex at an Anne Summers party.

[roverandout]

  On 07/01/2023 at 13:19, bluebruce said:

I disagree, but if it were true, I would wonder how much of that would be them feeling pressure from loads of judgemental men listening. Kind of like how I'd feel if I were asked to talk about sex at an Anne Summers party.

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Just listen to when a goal is scored. With women they put on an over the top voice. When its men it comes natural.  I'm not anti female.  It's just a find female commentators to be bland and uninspiring 

[Wheelton Blue]

The women commentators will improve as time goes on.

Cricket wise, Isa Guha is great to listen to on TMS, as good as the men IMO.

[Sparks Rover]

  On 07/01/2023 at 13:23, roverandout said:

Just listen to when a goal is scored. With women they put on an over the top voice. When its men it comes natural.  I'm not anti female.  It's just a find female commentators to be bland and uninspiring 

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That Leanne Sanderson drives me mad.  Terrible voice, looks cracked.

I once watched her on soccer Am doing the drills....terrible at football too

[toogs]

  On 07/01/2023 at 13:31, Wheelton Blue said:

The women commentators will improve as time goes on.

Cricket wise, Isa Guha is great to listen to on TMS, as good as the men IMO.

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Laura Davis is a great commentator on the golf. 

[Oldgregg86]

I think most of the females in the studio are very good at what they do, they do annoy me though when there cutting to grounds on sky sports news for updates. Can’t explain why it’s just bugs me . I think it’s the pitch of the voice which is no fault of there own maybe. I don’t know. Might be because when I hear them shout when a goal goes in I associate it with my bags been thrown down the stairs  🤷 😂

Edited January 7, 2023 by Oldgregg86

[bluebruce]

  On 07/01/2023 at 13:23, roverandout said:

Just listen to when a goal is scored. With women they put on an over the top voice. When its men it comes natural.  I'm not anti female.  It's just a find female commentators to be bland and uninspiring 

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Yeh, imagine if men went over the top when goals are scored....

 

[sympatheticclaret]

  On 05/01/2023 at 12:22, Ossydave said:

The misconception that Newcastle have the most loyal fans in the world, and that they're long suffering (or were till the recent takeover).

The shit ale at most grounds.  I know its not specifically football, but its part and parcel of the day out for many.  Rather bizarrely one of the best pints I've had this season was at the Turf!

Clinton Morrison.

"Who are ya" chants.

"Insert name here is a shithole, I wanna go home" - GO THEN.

Sky Sports trying to force womens football on us.

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It's not just me with Clinton Morrison, then !

In one of the " Under the Coash " podcasts, John Parkin, the ex-Preston forward said that Clinton Morrison once threatened to have him shot when he was playing against him. Lovely !

As for Sky and women's football, they are amateurs compared to the BBC ... In their " Fixtures and Results " webpage, they list fixtures in the order " Premier League, Scottish Premier League, Women's Super League, Championship, League 1, League 2 etc ", nobody dare explain that the standard is that of a Championship teams U15's ...

[simongarnerisgod]

f*****f video referees who get decisions wrong even after looking at them for 5 minutes

[Tyrone Shoelaces]

  On 07/01/2023 at 21:35, sympatheticclaret said:

It's not just me with Clinton Morrison, then !

In one of the " Under the Coash " podcasts, John Parkin, the ex-Preston forward said that Clinton Morrison once threatened to have him shot when he was playing against him. Lovely !

As for Sky and women's football, they are amateurs compared to the BBC ... In their " Fixtures and Results " webpage, they list fixtures in the order " Premier League, Scottish Premier League, Women's Super League, Championship, League 1, League 2 etc ", nobody dare explain that the standard is that of a Championship teams U15's ...

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What standard do you reckon the England womens team are at. Good mens amateur team ? Or not that good ?

[Tom]

That decision in the Liverpool Wolves game just now, one of the worst offside calls you’ll ever see (after West Ham at Ewood)

not even close to offside and VAR fails to correct it