Geese or swans?

[LDRover]

Back to the original topic - Big Ron had it right when he stated it's all psychological. Geese are mental, Swans are not. Ok sure Swans have the physical potential to be the dominant birds in this fighting class, but when it comes down to it, it's all about the will to win. Geese want to win - not just for the glory, but because it makes them feel hard. That makes this a non-contest in my opinion - unless the Swan has gone intensive psychological training to get a bit mental itself, then it's a close run thing.

 

Now that is a quality post and you've hit the nail on the head.

Driving back from ASDA today I spotted a solitary swan (no mates you see) on the Leeds Liverpool canal. There it was trying to look all serene and cool while aggravating a couple of ducks just going about their business.

This is a recurring theme and gives an insight into the mindset of the swan. Cowardly, aloof and pretentious. I mean if it wants to prove how superior it is why does it pick on the humble duck. You'll never catch one taking the biggest of an unruly gaggle on.

No bottle swans, in fact I'm sure they're related to jellyfish.

As for geese...well you just said it.

[colin]

Driving back from ASDA today I spotted a solitary swan

Well thank you. Proves my point exactly. You never see a solitary goose do you?

Soft little chavs, always have to hang around in gangs 'cos they're too soft to go out alone.

Swans. Hard enough to hang about by themselves

And no one has ever had their arm broken by a bloomin' goose.

I rest my case.

It was getting really heavy.

[Exiled_Rover]

Driving back from ASDA today I spotted a solitary swan

Well thank you. Proves my point exactly. You never see a solitary goose do you?

Soft little chavs, always have to hang around in gangs 'cos they're too soft to go out alone.

Swans. Hard enough to hang about by themselves

And no one has ever had their arm broken by a bloomin' goose.

I rest my case.

It was getting really heavy.

So you're discriminating against geese because they have friends?! What kind of animal are you  

You never hear of geese breaking people's arms because they're smart like that - they don't need the bad rep. Swans swan around knowing they've got the Queen and all her armies backing them up , they're royalty and can do as they damn well please!

[American]

Hoping they do Geese v. Swans eventually:

http://dsc.discovery.com/convergence/anima...malfaceoff.html

Just a shame that on the actual show they use computer simulations, not the real animals. Would love to see them do that and @#/? off PETA.

[Nuclearsox]

Hoping they do Geese v. Swans eventually:

http://dsc.discovery.com/convergence/anima...malfaceoff.html

Just a shame that on the actual show they use computer simulations, not the real animals. Would love to see them do that and @#/? off PETA.

Looking at that schedule, it's unfair on the Tiger. Firstly it has an away match against the lion and then almost straight after it's at home against the Grizzly Bear!!

[bob fleming]

Great spot American. It was only a matter of time before something like this happened.

My money is on the Gray Wolf in this instance - it looks a bit like an Alsatian and everyone know's that they're totally mental. The Cougar has a back side like Alan Shearer and while this would stand it in good stead if it was holding the ball up on the edge of the penalty area or backing into central defenders, the Wolf will ultimately kick it's hairy arse all the way back to Newcastle.

[Rachrover]

Good site American

I personally think the cougar would easily win, no messing.

I think the great white vs the crocodile would be a good one!!!

[colin]

I know of a hamster which could take the lot of you on.

One paw tied behind its back.

Cougar? (ppcheww)

[Alan75]

I know of a hamster which could take the lot of you on.

One paw tied behind its back.

Cougar? (ppcheww)

Just dont let it loose near a collie.

My daughter was broken hearted when, my collie swalled hammy in one bite.

[colin]

My daughter was broken hearted when, my collie swalled hammy in one bite.

Not our hampster.

It came in a container full of parsnips and Romanians from Ostend. It has big hard mates who will take on those darn Scottish doggies and whup their Jock (ahem) botties.

That Collie of yours, did it ever manage to round up any sheep without bloodshed?

[LynV]

For what it is worth in my youth I was bitten by a black swan while my dad was trying to take a photo of me at Slimbridge.

I was also chased by a white one.

No goose has ever done me any harm.

As a consequence I always give Swans a wide berth these days and avoid them as far as I can. Geese - no problem!

[Nayef]

Hoping they do Geese v. Swans eventually:

http://dsc.discovery.com/convergence/anima...malfaceoff.html

Just a shame that on the actual show they use computer simulations, not the real animals. Would love to see them do that and ###### off PETA.

My money would have been on the hippo but it seemed to have taken one heck of a beating by the bull shark.

Is the anaconda the snake that swallows creatures whole? If it is, there's no way it can lose.

It would be a tad difficult to fight back if you're holed up in the belly of a snake!

...unless the duck craps itself inside and walks out when the snake vomits.

[Finch]

Is the anaconda the snake that swallows creatures whole? If it is, there's no way it can lose.

It would be a tad difficult to fight back if you're holed up in the belly of a snake!

...unless the duck craps itself inside and walks out when the snake vomits.

Why Nayef, Thankyou for that delightful image

(where's the vomit-smiley on this thing...)

[Nayef]

<font color='#000000'>

LD ROVER u were talking about that lad in Fenny and the duck that shat on his kitchen floor, well he's also my mate and he doesnt have much luck when it comes to things using his house as a public lavatory. A few years ago i stayed at his house after a night in town, slept in his spare room woke up to realise i'd wet my self in his bed, i have to say i didnt hang around, i just strategically placed his cat beside the wet patch and left. By the way as i was leaving i noticed a gaggle of geese across from The Hordens. "Morning Geese" i said to which they cackled back at me-GEESE-respect-SWANS-no time for</font>

I've seen it all now.

[Nayef]

Is the anaconda the snake that swallows creatures whole? If it is, there's no way it can lose.

It would be a tad difficult to fight back if you're holed up in the belly of a snake!

...unless the duck craps itself inside and walks out when the snake vomits.

Why Nayef, Thankyou for that delightful image

(where's the vomit-smiley on this thing...)

ignore!

Edited April 16, 2004 by Nayef

[LDRover]

Absolutely no reason for this post other than to re-raise it cos I started it.

What about it though Geese and Swans ?

[American]

Absolutely no reason for this post other than to re-raise it cos I started it.

What about it though Geese and Swans ?

Well, I almost found out when on a walk this weekend with my pup, who would win in a ruck between a goose and a golden retriever/poodle mix. The only thing that made me hold him back (and he was at full "don't hold me back" mode - the leash pulling him up on his hind legs while he kept trying to run at them), was the knowledge of who would win in a ruck between the wife and I if he lost.

[Tom Pringle]

Went out this afternoon with the missus for lunch to the park.

Upon arriving at the park i noticed about 30 geese hanging around the car park looking into cars and basically messing with their burberry caps. I went down to the duck pond to enjoy watching the families feeding the mallards, coots, swans and various other forms of bird life within said pond.

After about 10 minutes one of the swans piped up and told the gang of geese to bugger off away from his C reg Ford Sierra 1.6 'Ghia'. This infuriated the geese and they decided to head down to the pond and give all the mouth to the swans.

Unfortunately i didn't get a chance to find out who was the hardest in the ruck as one of the families must have called the police who came down and calmed the potential ruck down.

[bob fleming]

Ah well, yes, you see, I missed that Tom. I notice you came across some Mallards the other day when running off and not paying for your lunch.

The Mallard is the hardest of the lot. It even sounds hard. "Oh look out here comes Mr Swan", "Oh no here's Mr Goose". "Holy s*** Batman!! Here's comes MR MALLARD!!" I think we all know which has the biggest impact and it has nothing to do with capital letters.

I've done quite a bit of research on this subject stretching back well over 2.5 minutes now and the mallard is described by many experts on dictionary.com to be "A large wild duck inhabiting both America and Europe . The domestic duck has descended from this species. Called also greenhead. Don’t mess with these lads they’re well up for it."

Tom - I think you had a lucky escape my good man. I'd suggest that if Big Col is ever going to sign you for Blackpool you keep well away from any crazy Mallard "firms". They can break your legs with their beaks I heard, from 25 yards.

[Alan75]

Hey what about the Ruddy Duck. they seem to be trouble.

Sex mad Americans who cause racial problems.

BBC NEWS

RUDDY DUCK, a pushy American settler which has been blasted for being "over-sexed and over here".

Like many of its countrymen, Ruddy Duck first came to Europe in the 1940s. But whereas GIs were frowned upon for whisking brides off back across the Atlantic, Ruddy Duck's approach was slightly different - it stayed in Europe to mate. It now has homes in 20 European countries.

Bristling with self confidence, perhaps because of its superior diving abilities, it had no trouble jaunting across to Spain where it would romance the elegant white-headed señorita ducks. The señors stood little chance, and the population collapsed so much that they became as strictly protected as the hump-backed whale.

Nothing would stop Ruddy and White Headed duck from mating, however. A particularly delicate racial problem came with their offspring - described as "genetically impure".

[bob fleming]

Ruddy Duck appears to be a lover rather than a fighter Alan. Wouldn't last 30 seconds in with a Mallard.

[Alan75]

You never know Bob, moonlight glistening over the water, a glass of wine, some romantic music, the old Ruddy Duck would be in before the Mallard knew what hit her.

And away in 30 seconds.

Edited June 12, 2004 by Alan75

[bob fleming]

Ruddy Ducks catchphrase is, I believe "I can do 'em quicker than they can pull 'em from under me". I believe the word is arrogant. No need for it Ruddy Duck, no need at all. He'll get what's coming to him eventually and I for one will sleep a lot better that night I can tell you.

[Alan75]

So did you have anything to do with this Mr Flemming.

Contract Out on RuddyDuck

[bob fleming]

Nothing to do with me that I'm pleased to report Alan. Although it has put a smile on my face. Having read bits of that article I noticed that they are also known as the "North American 'stifftail' " which certainly backs up your original post. Perhaps they should be called "Randy Duck" ?

Elsewhere the article goes on about culls beginning and culls ending, Beginning and then ending, Beginning again and then ending again. Beginning. Then ending.

Begnning again. And then ending again."These trials were to discover the best control method for ruddy ducks. The shootings resulted in some birds dying in protracted agony. According to a Department of the Environment report, one bird was shot 13 times and was still alive when picked up from the water. Another took two hours to die."

I'm sure many people will be extremely annoyed that this has gone wildly off topic, something I'm well aware of and feel really, really bad about. However, let's just consider that last paragraph again, it's certainly made me change my mind.

We have found our answer. Never mind geese, swans, tiger sharks, and mallards. Randy Duck was shot 13 times!! 13 times and was still alive!! What about that eh? Hard as nails in more ways than one. The ducks duck. A beast amongst birds and a right swine with the ladies to boot.

Surely the winner?